Sleeplessness
So here I sit, at work. It’s going on to 25 hours with 30 minutes of sleep and I’m seriously considering smoking in the office.
It’s not busy, quite slow actually, but just having to work with my boyfriend is stress enough. Any of you who work with a loved one will know what I mean by it’s not a good idea in the least bit.
Ok, so now it’s actually going onto 28 hours of no sleep and I have an hour and a half left of work. I got my jumprope finally so I have to brush up on my jumprope songs. Last night while jumping with a piece of string I could only get through the first rhyme in the Teddy bear Teddy bear song. Sad, right?
My goal is to learn all of them I can and hopefully, with my newfound love, I can reach my goal weight. Depending on how motivated I am by the end of it, I’m hoping to drop another ten to fifteen pounds by Halloween. I’m gonna shoot for one month so maybe I can surprise my Beau with the princess leia slave costume he wants me to wear and not have my pooch of a tummy, but something tells me that’s not realistic. It took three months for me to loose ten pounds, of course I cheated for a few weeks there because of my vacation to Chicago. Just managed to get my weight down to where it was before I left.
Wow, ok, so this blog has taken a turn than what I planned it being about haha. That’s ok though. I’ve been three hours without working with my boyfriend and so most of my stress has melted away. Excited to move the blog onto what’s on my mind I guess.
Anyway, back on track here. For those of you wondering, no I’m not starving myself on diets fit for supermodels. I actually have been eating what I want when I want, I’ve just been smart about it. I have been excercising, not as regularly a I was three months ago, but starting two nights ago I’ve been getting back on track with that.
I think most of it is because a lot of my friends have been getting married and having babies. With Jake and my relationship getting more serious as time goes on, I figured it wouldn’t hurt starting to turn my body into something that would fit into a wedding dress that I won’t embarrass myself in from, as I mentioned above, my pooch, or my intoned arms.
I was talking with mama about how pregnant people gain weight, as my friends have and I’m determined to at least get down into shape before I even think about that so maybe I can keep weight gain to a minimal.
I know I’m jumping way into the future there with my thinking, but time isn’t going by any slower so why the hell not try to get ahead of my game for once?
<3,
Xoxo
Correct me if im wrong
Just had a good talkin with mama. Jake picked me up for a date today and when he arrived, he looked a little angry. I could only guess it was because I asked him to pick me up at 5:30 instead of picking me up after he got off work at 4. Now, I understand how he could have been agitated by it because he lives 20 miles away, and he’d have to drive all the way back to pick me up, but I’m a night owl, work nights, literally can’t fall asleep until 6am or after and I don’t like waking up early on my days off for anything. Especially when I’m PMSing (which I so happen to be at this moment, consisting of fatigue, upset tummy, and just feeling blah and bitchy all over).
Anyway, we’ve been dating for (this month on the 23rd will make it…) 11 months, so he should know this by now, right? And, I gave him a choice of getting together tonight or tomorrow night. He just happened to pick tonight (his Friday), so he’s been up since 5am, himself being tired and bitchy from work, it would have been better planned if he said for tomorrow, when he could have slept and timing wouldn’t be an issue for either of us…
I’m getting off track here (I blame Taylor). Mama asked why he was mad, so I told her what you just read. Mama asked me if I couldn’t get up earlier so I can get ready by the time he gets off of work to pick me up. My reply?
I have to get up early for him when he hasn’t even once gotten up early for me? He hasn’t woken up to come and take me to breakfast before his shift starts at 6 am? Getting up at 3am instead of 5am isn’t in his mind, so why should I be the one to always get up early for him? On my days off to boot!
(I paused at this moment, for dramatically effect, or to take a puff from a cigarette, I’m not sure anymore, but then I continued). I already have taken unpaid days off of work for him willingly so we can spend time together, asking him to allow me my sufficient sleep time really isn’t something to get angry about.
Now, most girls won’t admit it, but I will. Though the female species can be believeable when it comes down to acting like we aren’t looking past tomorrow, and most of the time we aren’t, we still have the uncanny ability to be thinking of the future at the same time, giving the male species what can be likened to, an “interview.”
I told mama, I said, I’m only thinking of the future as well. If we are living together then, I’m definately not going to be getting up early for him every day. I’m going to continue living my life as I do now. He knew that he was dating a person with a sleeping habit that’s unlike other people, he has been made fairly aware of that since I started working with him over a year ago, and he’s delt with it on a weekly basis for almost a year. If we were to move in together, I don’t want him thinking that I’ll be sacrificing the way I live happily for him, as I don’t expect him to sacrifice his way of living for me.
Along those lines, I also brought up (though I can’t remember how I got on this tangent with her) that I am his first and only girlfriend, part of the reason I’m not so willing to change is because I don’t want to get into something 5 years down the road to have him tell me he wants to see other people. That I’m fine with, expectant I guess you can say, but I’m cool with it.
With that, I also started in on wondering about him being a security guard that’s getting paid 10 dollars an hour for the rest of his life or if he’s going to try to make something else of his life. I plan to, I know I need to make more than 10$ an hour to survive in this world. If I am to get up early on my days off for the love of my life, he’s going to have to be making enough to order a combo meal instead of sticking to the dollar menu.
Ok, ok, I didn’t say that last part, but it sounded good, right?
=^^=
Anyway, to cut this story short, and my friends are sick of hearing it (cause they do on a weekly basis), I’m sick of everyone knowing I’m a legit night owl, knowing that waking up early is hard for me, but I’m expected to, to fit into the “normal” people’s schedules, yet getting shit in return so I strongly believe my case and evidence trumps anything anyone has to say about it.
When my Huggy bear wakes up early for me, I’ll wake up early for him. I love him to death, don’t get me wrong, he’s The One, but sleep is just a little more important for my sanity.
<3,
Xoxo!
